Complex grief

At the Heart of It Sometimes sharing about our grief with others can end up feeling like a competition—who has had the “worst” experience, or who will “win” by giving the “right” answers about how to grieve? This is common and can happen in a variety of ways, and it’s often unintentional. The way to…

At the Heart of It Caregivers often feel exhausted, isolated, and unrecognized. It’s normal to feel anger, resentment, and guilt as a result of the stress of caring for another. There is no such thing as “perfection” in caregiving. This is a unique experience that can be challenging, but meaningful. Your best is good enough…

At the Heart of It Emotional stress like grief or overwhelm can manifest itself as physical symptoms. Those symptoms can create more stress and lead to something called the “Pain-Stress-Pain” cycle. Working through physical pain with a professional can help create the space needed to process our emotional stress and break the cycle.   I…

Can one form of grief be less significant than another? Here, we’ll explore how non-person losses, while sometimes perceived as “less-than” other forms of grief, can still feel the same. At the Heart of It Homesickness shares many similarities with grief in how we experience it when a loved one dies. Moving forward from homesickness…

Interview by Terry Becker; article by Amy Roberts At the Heart of It When witnessing or assisting with a grief experience, professionals often set aside their own feelings in order to be there for their clients. Society doesn’t always offer validation for pet loss. The connection between pets and their families is real, important, and…

From therapeutic art workshops with cancer patients to podcast interviews with athletic coaches, I’ve seen how different the effects of grief are in different people. We can feel it emotionally, we can watch it manifest itself physically, and we can see it reflected in our behaviors.But at the very center of the grief experience is the heart.The heart is…

Whose grief is worse: the doctor who loses her patient, or the family who loses their beloved dog?  Which situation is harder: a long, debilitating illness, or a sudden accident?  What community suffers more: the neighborhood devastated by a hurricane, or the town shocked by a mass shooting?  I hear comparisons like these all the…

“You were so lucky to have her for so long.”  Martha was 75 years old when her mother, Rose, died. Rose had just turned 101. Martha’s friends comforted her by saying how lucky Rose was to live so long, and how lucky Martha was to have that time with her. But Martha did not feel…

In the early days of my working life, one of my colleagues returned from bereavement leave. Her husband had just passed away, and it was her first day back at work. I froze when I saw her walking down the hallway. I wanted her to know I was there for her, but I was so…

When we think of who is working on the front lines of grief and loss, we picture hospice nurses, firefighters, and counselors. We imagine doctors and first responders. But do you think of teachers? In the early days of my career, I never would have put grief work and teachers together. Now, teachers are some…